Help! I’m Living in A Horror Movie

First a quick update – I haven’t had any applicants yet in my quest for a sexy chef, so if you know any single 45 or older gentleman that might fit the bill, send them my way 😜.

As for the horror movie that is my life, I have one word – ANTS 🐜🐜! Every time I think they have subsided another onslaught of the little assholes occurs. Today I found them crawling all over my hamper of dirty laundry 🤢. And if that wasn’t bad enough, I also found a ton of them in an upstairs closet crawling over old sheets and t-shirts on the floor. Then I got bit, again, trying to shove the material in a bag (side note – icing the bites for two fifteen-minute stints made a huge difference, just in case you ever get bit). Fortunately, my pest control was scheduled for today and I’m hoping to have a small reprieve for a few days as he sprayed both floors (🙏🏻 thank the goddesses 🙏🏻). I say small reprieve as it appears (according to the exterminator’s inspection) that the ants have migrated into the foundation – AAAAARRRRGGGGGHHHHH! (I’ll bet you heard that scream in your head…)

This will now set up a showdown with the builder as I try to have the problem eliminated 🤦‍♀️. I’ve decided to call Monday so expect a Monday Night Raw post next week 👊🏻. I just need a few days to gear up for that battle because these ants have had me close to a breakdown since I have been under constant the attack (7 separate outbreaks in the last month 😳)! I’d like to say I wouldn’t wish this on anyone, but there is one couple that I wouldn’t mind having to is battle these f🤬🤬🤬ers instead of me… 😁😁😁.

So, evidently the curse did not die with the selling of the property and is firmly attached to my aura for the moment. Fear not, I shall find a way to break this twisted magic and maybe send it back to the one who cursed me in the first place 😆😆.

Please send well wishes for some peace for the weekend and support for the battle royale set to take place Monday – I’ll take all the help I can get 😊😊.

If this day wasn’t weird enough, I watching some sort to fight among the birds for ownership of my tree out front 🤔. I’m being overrun by nature, send help… 😳 🤣🤣