Happy Unimportant Day to Me!

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I have been dreading today. Today would have been my 26th wedding anniversary. I’d like to forget that but, you know, when you’re married for 22 years (as of 2018) it’s going to take a while for that to happen 🤷‍♀️.

Then this popped up in my Facebook memories today (from 2020):

“I would like you all to join me in not celebrating the most unimportant day of my life (formerly known as my wedding anniversary). No gifts or cards required, just the knowledge that you enjoy this spectacularly unimportant day in my life is all I need 😁😁😁.”

Citation = Me 🥰

And I thought “that’s the type of anniversary I should be celebrating…”. So, I’m taking back today and officially declaring it the Most Unimportant Day in my history. No f🤬🤬ks will be given, no other acknowledgement of that gigantic asshole and his duplicitous whore (Sorry I couldn’t help myself; I just love those descriptors 😆😆😆) going forward. Maybe I’ll even buy a special treat for myself 😊.

That is how these anniversaries should be celebrated, especially if you’re the aggrieved former partner. Rise out of the dread and take back your day! Celebrate how inconsequential the day of your former anniversary is!

This is how I choose to acknowledge this September 14th going forward 🍾🥂.

So, My Lovelies, if you find yourself dreading a particular day due to someone else’s behavior, make a conscious decision to celebrate your wonderfulness on that day. You will not regret it 🥰. 

Meanwhile, I’m off to calendar this new celebration in my phone for next year.

💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜💜

And This is Why People Don’t Go to Doctors 😡

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Well, it was testing week to see who is right – me or my gynecologist. I was hoping to walk away with some answers today, but apparently that is not how the system works 😡.

For those who missed my “Getting Back on Track” post, I mentioned that I was having a disconcerting health issue in my southern region. And since I don’t like to leave My Lovelies hanging here is the first follow-up to my misadventures with health care.

Today I was scheduled for and internal ultrasound to determine if there was anything amiss. I have had them in the past, so not to concerning. Settled in for a quick appointment with a great ultrasound tech and as we finished, I asked what next? Is she going to tell me what she saw? Because that’s what I’ve experienced in the past with these things. But of course not, that would be too streamlined 😒. She just takes the images, gives them to her doctor, he/she (?) then reads them and tells my doctor who will then inform me in two weeks 🙄. This is what modern medicine has turned into!!! We aren’t making it easier (or less expensive really) to see a doctor when issues arise 🤬🤬 (lest we forget it took 2 phone calls and some begging to convince them I needed an appointment in the first place). 

I am usually a proponent of doctors – I go to both my GYN and primary care once a year. I do my mammogram faithfully every year, and you ladies know that ain’t a lot of fun. But with the changes in how insurance operates, with higher co-pays, large deductibles to meet and corporate hospitals running things, it’s a wonder anyone ever goes!?! It’s sure making me rethink everything.

So, I still have no news but the meds the doctor gave me 2 weeks ago seem to be helping and I’m not experiencing any pain, so there’s that. Hopefully in 2 weeks (and a 3rd $60 copay later 🙄) I’ll have some answers. And not that I want to have an issue, but I do want something to be found, just to prove my doctor wrong for telling me what I was experiencing “normal” 😜.  Yes, I’m petty like that 😁.

Here’s hoping 🤞!

I Guess it’s a Good Thing?

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Apparently, I do not scare children whatsoever 🤪. Not that I was trying to. In fact, I seem to have the opposite effect on them.

You see, I was working at the library, finishing up yesterday’s post, when an older child (9 y.o I learned) comes though the young adult section, looking like he was on a mission. I asked if he was looking for a quiet place and he nodded as he raced off. A few minutes later he returns and interrupts me to ask me if I was in that section because it was quiet, which, of course, I was. Well, he took that as an invitation to sit down and join me 😆😆😆 (there was another table right nearby, so I’m guessing he just wanted someone to talk to). He pulls out his slime (with glitter – I hate glitter 😜) from its container and proceeds to play with it all while asking me various questions. I gotta say, kids have no filter when it comes to personal questions 😬. Fortunately, I don’t mind because I know it comes from a place of curiosity and short answers are best 😊.

While we are chatting, his three-year-old brother decides to join us!?! And he starts pulling books of shelves to “read”. And he was polite enough to grab one for all three of us 💜. As he’s paging through the book, a third boy (7 y.o. if I had to guess?) decides to join us 🤯. At this point, I am not sure what happened, but I was surrounded by three children that were not related to me 😳. They were related to each other though. At this point the oldest is annoyed and takes off. The middle child takes off after him, as I suspect he wanted his brother’s attention. The youngest hangs around for a while longer before realizing the others aren’t coming back, so he scoots on out of there.

At this point, I put away my computer away just in case (thankfully I had finished a second pass on my post before closing down). And it was a good thing because a few minutes later the oldest was back, hiding from the other two and went back to him showing off his skills with his slime and asking more questions 😆. Not five minutes later, the middle child comes back with a book followed by what I thought was the youngest. Because, lo and behold, their (very loud) toddler sister decides we are having so much fun she needs to join 🤦‍♀️. So, the toddler is using her voice to command attention, the three-year-old is talking about ghosts, the 7-year-old shows me a children’s book on geography (which I encouraged him to check out 😁) and the oldest looks like he just wants some peace and quiet 🤫.

This keeps up for about 30-40 minutes – them tagging in and out at my table. And my library friends keep walking by wondering why I have children that clearly don’t belong to me and I’m just trying to figure out how I became the watcher of unknown children during all of that 🤔?!?

I must give off some sort of vibe that I am a “safe” adult to be around. And mostly, I don’t mind as it seems to be my lot in life to entertain children and play with animals 🤷‍♀️. But I was relieved when their grandmother (I’m assuming) came to gather them up because 4 young children is a lot of energy coming at you 😆😆.

Unfortunately, as a parting gift, I ended up with glitter on me 😱😱. I REALLY hate that stuff 😡.

I Love My Neighbors Until…

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…they start grass shaming me 😮! Those who mow their lawns know what I am talking about, this unspoken war that happens every summer – the weekly race to cut the grass to make your neighbor’s look bad 😆. Of course, I’m joking 😉, but one day in June my neighbors on either side of me mowed on the SAME DAY, double grass shaming me 🤯🤯. So, of course I was forced to mow the next day (insert patented dramatic SIGH here 😜).

In all the years I’ve been mowing, I’ve never had neighbors so close to my yard that it shows when I’m a little lax on my yard work. And quite honestly, I find the not so serious rivalry funny because I’m soooooo over mowing and I have a riding mower for a small lawn 🤪. I mean I still do it, but I’m not so concerned about it like I would have been in the past (that may have something to do with having an OCD partner 🤔). It starts to get unwieldy – I mow. I don’t even edge it that often (or at all really), that’s how much I am over yardwork. Plus edging is a bitch 🤬🤬. But I do so enjoy when I actually beat them to mowing, the rare times it happens 😆😆😆. 

Little friendly neighborhood rivalries are fun. And I got very, very lucky to have the next-door neighbors that I have. Each are quick to help when they can, and I return the favor whenever possible. Not everyone has such luck (have you seen the show “Fear Thy Neighbor”? 😳). And, actually, the whole neighborhood is pretty great place to live. 

But I can’t lie – my next move will be into a condo, so that others can manage the grounds, because I’m not that interested in mowing until the end of my days 😁.

Tell me about your unspoken friendly neighborhood “rivalries”. Comments are open and appreciated!

Getting Back on Track

Who doesn’t like looking at a puppy? 💜Photo by coco HACHE on Pexels.com

Hello My Lovelies! I apologize for my absence, but I needed a creative break. Every time I sat down to write last week, the words just came out sounding cranky and that’s not what I want this blog to be about. Humorous, honest and (hopefully) inciteful at times, but not cranky 😁.

I’m hopeful that my creative break has helped me to refocus my writing. Guess we’ll have to see know now won’t we 😜? By the way, does anyone else’s fingers have a mind of their own when typing? I don’t know why I am consistently typing know for now 🤦‍♀️. I seriously have typing issues 😆😆.

Anyway, I also took a break because I realized part of my crankiness is the world in general is just disappointing me lately – particularly the news. Politics aside, why is it so hard to just extend kindness to people? A smile, a simple “have a nice day” or perhaps a compliment can really brighten someone’s day. And I find myself feeling a warm tingle in my cold dead heart (just kidding) as well when I greet people with a smile or a kind word. Think about incorporating kindness into your daily life and see if it makes your day a little better, if only for a short while 😊.

Lastly, I have been dealing with an issue that my gynecologist did not think is an issue and that has had me distracted lately. As I make my way through this wonderful thing we call “the change” (for good reason), there has been a change in my own body that does not feel normal as my doctor claims it is (I had to call twice to insist on an appointment 🙄). And maybe it is, but when you’ve had various issues in that region over the years, you trust your instincts. I know my body, and this is not how my body works 😁. Besides it’s my money and if I want to be sure, then run the tests needed to assure me. So, I have another appointment next week for a certain test and should know something in the next month. It was annoying because I’m not an alarmist, so if I call outside of my annual visit, attention should be paid – just saying 🤷‍♀️.

And don’t be too concerned (yet) because I don’t think I’m experiencing anything radical, just something that indicates there may be more going on than menopause. As patients, we absolutely have to advocate for ourselves if we are concerned and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise – unless you’re a hypochondriac, then maybe take a breath before calling 😉.

So that’s a quick update on my life, other than I need to take a news break again. It’s just so depressing 🙁. And I need to figure out my place in the universe – nothing too heavy 🤪. 

I will work on getting back on track, so bear with me My Lovelies 💜💜💜

Peace!

Not a Recap – I Love a Mama’s Boy S3. Ep.11

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It’s finale night! And it was mostly tame, save for the long haulers Shekeb and Matt 🙄. So, let’s get to it 😁.

Mom Kelly and Matt: I say again, I need Matt off of my show. He’s storyline is first up tonight, and we find him meeting with Brittany in some random park. And instead of coming clean about his bs, he gaslights her about their relationship stating they were never “exclusive”, then acts like all of her actions were so out of line and that’s why they aren’t compatible. Then he runs away again, because he has nothing more to say.  Ooh, lightbulb 💡 – Matt pulled the same crap on my girl Kim at the end of last season, storming off after treating her poorly when she tried to talk with him. Well at least this time he didn’t bring his mom this time 😒. Stupid man-child 🤬🤬🤬. And later we get to meet the new woman and see how happy they are, while Kelly sits at home alone missing her “best friend”. Also, she hasn’t met the new girlfriend yet. And that’s all the energy I am giving these people this season.

Mom Esther, Ethan, and Leyna: Wow – we get to meet Ethan’s younger brother, Shane, this week 😮! Shane joins us for one scene and gets dragged into the whole “Leyna doesn’t like us flirting” fight. To them he says, he kind of shrugs it off as normal, though he says in his confessional he warns his friends he brings over about it because he knows it’s weird to people outside their household. He also sides with Leyna, but not to their faces, probably because he knows better 😆😆. Also, while we met Shane this week and stepdad last week, we have never seen Ethan’s twin – his twin’s girlfriend, but not his twin. Very peculiar 🤔. Anyway, the conversation shifts to the wedding as Esther claims she is inviting 20 people from her tennis club (not sure if that’s 10 with +1’s or what) and she says she that the number is getting high (their trying to keep it to 200) and she wants Leyna to cut from her list because she’s paying for it 😬. Lesson – be careful letting people pay for your wedding because this is the sh🤬🤬 that can happen! We change scenes to Ethan taking Leyna for a nice picnic to the spot he proposed to her because they have been so busy, he wanted to do something special for her. Now I know you’re thinking “aww, how sweet” and it would be if Ethan hadn’t brought up the conversation regarding the guest list and the need cuts. He says his mom will be cutting back, but I’m pretty sure that’s a lie. Come to find out that she’s only inviting 75 people on her side while the combination of invitees from both of his parents is way more than her 75 (Esther has 80 and his dad has 50). She is not having it (especially since Ethan is siding with his mom) – date night ruined. In the third scene we have with them (they got a lot of screen time tonight…) we see Ethan and Leyna rolling up to Esther’s house and before Leyna can even bring up the guest list, Ethan and Esther start their antics again. When Leyna confronts them about already having had a conversation with both of them about this, they basically continue to tease her by continuing the lovey dovey behavior as a way to say her feelings don’t matter. And she’s left wondering why she should put up with this. In the end – the wedding was postponed.  But not for the reasons you think. We find out that three weeks after they stopped filming for the season, Ethan’s service cat had become terminally ill and passed. Ethan couldn’t even think about getting married at that time because he was overwhelmed by the loss of his cat and Leyna understood (which speaks a lot to her love for him). Of course, the shady editors ask Esther if there was that the only reason the wedding was postponed 😉😉. She looks confused and says “No”. So damn shady 😆😆.

Mom Nancy, Robert and Kristy: It’s a quick scene with Kristy and Robert. While it’s only been a few days, Robert says that he feels so much better not having to deal with his mom’s attitude towards his wife.  Robert profusely thanks Kristy for putting up with the mama drama and for not leaving him. She says “I thought about it a bunch of times” and no one would blame her. But she really seems to love him and their family, so she fought for it and good on her. He still holds out hope that Nancy will apologize but that’s a mama’s boy for you. Sometimes you need to cut the toxicity out of your life, even if it is family. On the plus side, the couple has stopped fighting and it’s a lot less stressful for them. When asked by producers if he’s still a mama’s boy, he says his is now a “wifey boy” which is both sweet and sort of disturbing at the same time 😆😆. But we know he meant it in a positive way 💜.

Mom Laila, Shekeb and Emily: This will be short because I don’t care how it turns out for any of these crazy people. They talk about their rollercoaster of a relationship and Emily wants to know if Shekeb is mad at her. While he isn’t mad at her, he still won’t propose unless Leila approves (not gonna happen), even though that’s all that Emily wants (she thinks them getting married will “fix things” between her and Laila 🙄). Emily is focused on the wrong things here. I’m not sure where she got this idea that just because she is 30 or so, she is an old maid (paraphrasing of course 😁) and she is holding on to Shekeb for dear life. It’s just a bad situation all around. And to make matters worse – Shekeb thinks he has the most perfect plan to “fix” things between the two of them. He brings Emily to his mom’s house and announces that he thinks they should all live together so that Laila can get to know Emily better. Long story short (“too late” – Clue the movie 😆) Emily throughs a world class tantrum and Laila starts her tears of manipulation flowing 😒. In the end – Skekeb sends Emily home in an Uber/Lyft and he stays to comfort his mom (tears of manipulation – 1, Emily – 0).

At the close of the show, we have brief updates on all the couples, and they are as follows:

  • Matt and Kelly: Very much in love with the new woman and looking to buy a larger home with her and her kids. Kelly does not approve.
  • Robert, Kristy, and Nancy: Robert still hasn’t spoken to his mom except to tell her to keep her distance until she gets therapy. Kristy is happy to have her family back 💜.
  • Tre, Abbey, and Lorenda: Trey and Abbey are still close friends and doting parents of Kam. Abbey is in her own apartment and seeing someone new (💜💜) while Tre is remodeling his house with “Lorenda by his side”.
  • Shekeb, Emily, and Laila: Shakeb moved out of the apartment and back in with Mom (no shocker there 🙄). Laila and Tuti (his bird) are happy to have him home.
  • Ethan, Leyna and Esther: they didn’t get the same closing montage as the others because they were already interviewed (see above), but I can tell you that the wedding is rescheduled for September 4th, 2022! Just four short days away. I am happy for them, but I hope they have worked out their linger issues and by issues, I mean Esther 😁. Congratulations to the bride and groom 🍾🥂!

And so the sun sets on another season of crazy mom/son relationships. If you find yourself in need of family dysfunction there is always sMothered 😳. Until next season 😘.

Not a Recap – I Love a Mama’s Boy S.3 Ep.10

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I think I just love yelling at these people 🤔. Let’s talk Mama’s Boy…

Mom Nancy, Robert, and Kristy: It’s been a few days since the blow-up over Nancy’s unwillingness to admit she was wrong and apologize to Kristy 🙄. But let’s be honest, we never expected her to. She has so much hate for Kristy because, *checks notes* they eloped (literally checked my notes 😆). Honestly, I just think Nancy doesn’t like Kristy! Anyway, she ropes her son Jacob into listening her vent about Kristy, again – probably because he is the only one that agrees with her (none on her other sons have been mentioned other than in passing). I also have a theory that he hopes to gain “status” with his mother by taking her side and vociferously defending her, going so far as to s🤬🤬t on Kristy, just like Nancy does. That’s just my opinion. She is still ranting that the paternity test was fake (to be fair, the results were emailed, and Kristy had to print them herself) and how she hasn’t been able to get a hold of the lab to confirm them – not I’m sure that they would tell her anything with HIPPA and all. Later in the episode, Kristy and Robert bring the youngest daughter (the one whose paternity is in question) to see her to see if she is willing to apologize, which, as we know, she will not. Robert so desperately wants his mother to accept Kristy, but it just isn’t going to happen, so he tells her he chooses his wife/family over her. And of course, Nancy blames Kristy, taking no responsibility for her actions. Hell, she even threatens to beat Kristy AGAIN. Two words Kristy – RESTRAINING ORDER. And include the children! She is an awful person who gets no sympathy from the online community, from what I can tell.

Mom Laila, Shekeb, and Emily: two things – I them all of them off this show next year and damn it, Shekeb is making me defend Emily again! Shekeb is at home being babied by his mom (the man is in his 30’s for goddess sake 😒) and he is still defending his mom, saying that Emily disrespected Yususra because in his culture a guest is a guest and should be treated as such. Hey dumba🤬🤬, how about the fact that she was trying to extend an olive branch to your mom and dad  and Laila s🤬🤬t all over her by bringing Yusura, the woman you went on a date with?!? I cannot with this guy anymore. And while I agree Emily could have handled the situation better, she didn’t start this fight. Next, we find Yusura calling Shekeb to apologize for her part in the dinner party from hell and I’m thinking, ok she’s on the right track (though she should be calling Emily). She says she felt obligated to Laila and that’s why she went along with it. But as she is going out of town, she tells Shekeb to let Emily know that she is not a threat. Still going in the right direction, until… She tells Shekeb that if Emily and him break up to give her a call. So close to being on the right side of things Yusura, so close…. And in next week previews, I’m back to questioning Emily’s maturity and ability to manage her anger (insert dramatic sigh here…)

Mom Esther, Ethan and Leyna: Ugh, poor Leyna is reduced to tears this episode because she fears that Ethan and Esther’s dynamic will never change 😢. I mean it starts off happy because she’s in Long Island NY with her mom for a dress fitting and she looks lovely. Mom is a bit put off by Esther from the start as Esther is using the fact that she is paying for the wedding to not include Leyna’s mom in the planning. I mean, Leyna handed it over to Esther (or was pushed to let her take care of it 🤔?) but she could have tried to include the mother of the bride especially since Esther insisted on being facetimed during the initial dress search. The fitting goes well and it’s time to pull in the extra’s for some color commentary – that being the bridal shop employees. They explain how future MIL thinks she needs a outfit change at the wedding and the staff are all saying WTF, they’ve never heard of such a thing. So at least Leyna isn’t crazy for thinking the same thing. And if you really look at the whole situation, Esther is a bridezilla and she’s not the one getting married!!! But Leyna does confess that she is struggling to get Ethan to understand her point of view on the weird way he acts with his mother, especially in public and when her mom asks if she’s changing her mind about getting married, she breaks down. As the wedding is not to far off, Leyna needs to sit down with Ethan and figure out a reasonable solution before she says I do. On the other side of the coin, we see Ethan visiting his mom but stops to talk to his stepfather first in an effort to get him on his side (much like Tre tried last episode 🙄) and while he doesn’t endorse the weirdness, he says that’s what you’re going to get when you marry into this family. Basically a non-committal response which Ethan takes as support 🤦‍♀️. 

Mom Lorenda, Tre, and Abbey: Abbey arrives at her mom’s house with her solo bag and I’m beginning to think that she’s already moved most of her stuff over there, including her son. Not that we see him this episode. The whole set-up is weird 🫤. But her mom is both sad for her daughter’s break-up and happy to have her (and her grandson) in her home. This relationship has been on and off for ten years and maybe it’s time for a clean break. Tre let’s his mother in on the break-up and while she pays lip-service to doing right by their son, she still can’t help but take shots at Abbey. Lady – you got what you wanted, leave the poor girl alone!!!!! On Abbey’s side of things, she finally says what I’ve been saying all along, Tre need to grow-up and learn how to take care of himself. But I don’t see Lorenda letting that happen. And, honestly, I think this break-up will be the best thing for her. With a couple of episodes left, I wonder if we will see much more of them…

Next week’s episode looks like a doozy – Brittany confronting Matt and Emily losing her mind again. 

Last thoughts: Still team Abbey, Kristy, Leyna and Brittany. And team Kim for realizing last season that Matt was not the one for her. I also hope Ethan takes a hard look at modifying some of his behavior if he truly wants to marry Leyna, but that just my opinion 🤷‍♀️. Also props to Robert for supporting his wife 😍.

Until next week…